Making Impact: "Watch Your Utterances Before Your Kids".
Proverb 15:4 says" A wholesome tongues is a tree of life: but perverseness therein is a breach in the spirit".
At work, this lady just came to sit by my side as she got off the flight. Her daughter, pretty inquisitive one of five years or there about asked "mom, is dad coming to pick us home" to which this lady responded "Yes".
Little madam pried further, "but mommy you always told dad he is stupid, are you sure he will remember, let's call him to remind him she blurted"
Big lady was taken off guard, I was taken off guard too and so the man seated next to me. In her confusion and misery, mixed with shame, she stared at her daughter in rage /embarrassment as I stared at her with utter displeasure. She could see the hate in my eyes.
I turned to the little lady and said "Your Daddy is not stupid and he will remember to come and pick you home. Maybe, daddy did something mommy didn't like and she said it.
She said to me, aunty, mommy always says it and daddy will just tell her thank God you married a stupid man.
I went further to explain to her that adults usually say things they don't mean to each other, and that mommy always apologises to daddy even though she doesn't say it in her presence.
I explained to her why she should not say that again, even if she heard mommy say it to daddy again.
Her phone rang and off she went with her daughter, that was after I wrote on a paper, "don't beat her, don't hate yourself, I'm sure God wanted you to change your ways".
She's not the only parent guilty of this. Most parents say terrible things to each other in the heat of misunderstanding and they usually forget the kids are watching or listening.
I know a man that would call his wife a whore before his children, when you ask the kids what their mom does for a living they will say "prostitution". This is a woman who keeps a decent job at a company that produces detergents.
This posts is not to judge or condemn but to charge parents to make a change where necessary. There are better ways to express your displeasure towards your spouse without name calling and abuses...you can start today.
We parents should learn to bridle our tongues,that bad habit you drop today can shape your future tomorrow
SCENES YOUR CHILD/CHILDREN SHOULD NEVER WITNESS
1. You and your spouse insulting each other and using curse words. They start to respect you less
2. You beating up your spouse. Your son is exposed to the evil side of masculinity, your daughter grows up wary of men
3. You and your spouse fighting. Your children will begin to feel less safe at home
4. You and your spouse attacking your child, not believing in your child, talking down at your child. He/she will psychologically run away from home
5. You and your spouse competing against each other. They grow up thinking family is not unity
6. You having an affair. Unfaithfulness hurts children the most, they just don't get to say it because they don't have a voice
7. You disrespecting your husband. Your son will learn to be defensive and your daughter will learn to be spiteful
8. You abdicating your responsibility as a parent or spending less time at home. Your child will feel unloved
9. You and your spouse giving each other silent treatment, banging doors, being rude to each other, walking away when the other shows up in the room. It breaks the heart of your young one.
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